We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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