"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
