At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
