my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
