So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Randomize