Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
