girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
