I am puke
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
