yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
