idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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