she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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