I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
