nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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