yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
