there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
