Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
