bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
