i permit you to call me
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
