Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
