return my video game
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
