I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
