if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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