did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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