I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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