i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
