It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize