Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
this boner is exhausting
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
