the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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