Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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