honey bunches of taint.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
