The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
