mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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