Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
