make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
