I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
