i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
