I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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