I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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