id be glad to
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize