I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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