I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
