Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
