Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
