Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
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