yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
