Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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