butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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