Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
