tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
