i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
i think im in europe. pls send help
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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