I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize